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[原创] 欲沉还浮

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发表于 2006-6-6 00:07 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
&nbsp;<p class="MsoNormal"><font color="15080002"><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">这些日子,我就快要沉沦</span><span lang="EN-US">..</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">沉伦</span><span lang="EN-US">…</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">我的世界处于极度灰暗的黑洞中</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">找不到光亮的出口</span><span lang="EN-US">. </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">连绵的雨天</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">阴晦的天气</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">加剧着我内心阴沉的一面</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">矛盾</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">悲观</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">厌世</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">萎糜</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">失望</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">自卑</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">多疑</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">郁郁寡欢</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">欲止又前</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">欲前却止</span><span lang="EN-US">!</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">确定要放弃却又生怕错过可能会有的东西</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span></font></p><p class="MsoNormal"><font color="15080002"><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">夜暮垂临</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">我似经过九死一生的病人一样没有生气</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">我孤言寡语</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">昏昏欲睡</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">总会早于就寝时间就睡了</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">怕醒来</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">想就此地睡去</span><span lang="EN-US">…</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">总在凌晨</span><span lang="EN-US">1</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">点</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">又像初春到来复苏的麦苗一样</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">缓缓醒来</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">然后脑袋在极度清醒的午夜疯长各种念头</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">恐怖的越想越发毛</span><span lang="EN-US">;</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">欢乐的越想越生悲</span><span lang="EN-US">;</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">悲伤的越想越麻木</span><span lang="EN-US">….</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">然后在黎明前又似冬眠般沉沉睡去</span><span lang="EN-US">…</span></font></p><p class="MsoNormal"><font color="15080002"><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">在天空泛起鱼肚白的早晨,我无法正常醒来看到,我是在闹钟的狂叫里给闹醒的,已经七点半了,拖着还在睡眠状态的身体,眼睛却得睁开着,像个游魂般上了洗手间,刷牙,洗脸,然后忽然觉得我还是活着的,因为还知道肚子饿,我得面对现实。从不喜欢用心理暗示来提升自己心境的我,居然也要拿起镜子对着里面那个折射镜像拼命活动面部表情,告诉自己你状态不错,精神也不错,你是最棒的!放下那面小镜子的同时,我却在咒骂见鬼去吧!这样就是最棒的,世界就不会有精神病院了。因为我的表情依旧僵硬,脸色依然令人望而生厌,情绪依旧在谷底,我对身边所有的一切依然感觉不满!不管怎样,我想以第一个笑容与晨阳打招呼。却惊觉外面的世界和我的世界同样风起云涌,就算朝阳有心露个脸,还是无奈那翻天覆地的层层灰晦的云朵!我开始称赞以前诅咒的毒辣的太阳,想念那渗人心肺的蔚蓝色,想念那打心底就透彻的清爽</span><span lang="EN-US">…</span></font></p><p class="MsoNormal"><font color="15080002"><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">走进办公室</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">关上身后那道门</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">有种哐啷入狱的感觉</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">站在五楼望向窗外</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">倍感失去自由</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">那闷叫的蝉鸣声</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">让我的双眼眼皮加重</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">打开电脑</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">全然没了以前的兴味盎然</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">人总喜欢说自己的大脑不是电脑</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">无法装那么多东西</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">所以选择遗忘一些</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">选择性记住另一些</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">其实电脑何尝不是呢</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">不管你储存多少东西进去</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">那都是我们人类帮它储存的</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">如果我们忘记了那些存在里面的东西</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">电脑记住也等于忘记了</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">恰如现在我的电脑也以一张电脑脸面对着我</span><span lang="EN-US">..</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">外边,天空储备了半天的狂风暴雨,终于爆发,伴着风声雨声,由远而近,我赶紧关了窗户,只为了让自己不会与它融为同一世界去。</span></font></p><p class="MsoNormal"><font color="15080002"><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">隔离车间传来的机械声让我缓回了神</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">没有灵魂的机械转动下肩上的脑袋</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">双眼空洞而没焦距的环视下四周</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">又落回到电脑屏幕前</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">于是车间的机械声开始变得很遥远</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">而我恍若置身在与世隔绝的空间中</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">那里只有我</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">只好越沉越深</span><span lang="EN-US">…</span></font></p><p class="MsoNormal"><font color="15080002"><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">一天下来就这么浑浑噩噩的</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">思想没被更新过</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">只有阴和雨</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">夜色又开始笼罩整个大地</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">苍穹下的一切越发显得死一般的沉寂</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">仿佛听到自己体内血液流动的声音</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">似是要告诉我我还活着</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">是自然界中生存着的一员</span><span lang="EN-US">.</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">或许也只有它让我没彻底沉沦下去</span><span lang="EN-US">..</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">因为我还记得今天还有最后一件事</span><span lang="EN-US">,</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;;">洗澡</span><span lang="EN-US">!</span></font></p>
发表于 2006-6-6 16:26 | 显示全部楼层
<p>1994年夏,我由云南边境潜入缅甸,寻找一个叫“袋狼”的人。</p><p>这次任务不可小视。</p><p>热带的丛林里散发着腐败的浊气,又是一个通宵达旦的监视,但目标没有在预定的地点出现,难道某个环节出了差错?</p><p>如果我的身份暴露,那意味着全面溃败。两年了的跟踪和踏寻都将失去意义。</p><p>我等待着,安静且从容...</p>
发表于 2006-6-10 04:13 | 显示全部楼层
路过。
发表于 2006-6-23 23:18 | 显示全部楼层
<p>通常洗完澡再看会电视或听会歌,才能入睡.</p>
发表于 2006-6-23 22:10 | 显示全部楼层
[em01][em01][em01]
发表于 2006-6-24 01:27 | 显示全部楼层
<p>回忆中一半是痛苦的</p><p>一大半又是快乐的</p><p>曾经有段时间就是这样的活</p><p>但雨过了天会睛就是指我们的生活</p><p></p>
发表于 2006-6-28 22:18 | 显示全部楼层
文倩姐姐,有时我也会像你一样。那没你那么严重。我觉得我们好像知己,我会有你一样的感觉,一样的频率。我们的工作也是一样的。
发表于 2006-7-2 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
<div class="quote"><b>以下是引用<i>清华天天</i>在2006-6-28 14:18:24的发言:</b><br/>文倩姐姐,有时我也会像你一样。那没你那么严重。我觉得我们好像知己,我会有你一样的感觉,一样的频率。我们的工作也是一样的。</div><p></p>看来两位小妹都不错,要想办法娶回家才是,网上的版主帅哥们大家努力啊![em01]
发表于 2006-7-3 02:00 | 显示全部楼层
<div class="quote"><b>以下是引用<i>msj500</i>在2006-7-2 8:47:31的发言:</b><br/><div class="quote"><b>以下是引用<i>清华天天</i>在2006-6-28 14:18:24的发言:</b><br/>文倩姐姐,有时我也会像你一样。那没你那么严重。我觉得我们好像知己,我会有你一样的感觉,一样的频率。我们的工作也是一样的。</div><p></p>看来两位小妹都不错,要想办法娶回家才是,网上的版主帅哥们大家努力啊![em01]</div><p>呵,努力。仁兄可不能够朝三又暮四。</p>
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